How to Improve Your Mental Health

In this episode, Manpreet Dhaliwal discusses the essential steps to improve mental wellness, emphasizing the importance of slowing down, observing emotions, challenging denial, and letting go of societal timelines. The conversation encourages listeners to embrace discomfort with self-compassion and to navigate their own paths toward authentic happiness and mental well-being.

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Chapters

• 0:00 Introduction to Mental Wellness
• 3:07 The Importance of Slowing Down
• 6:03 Challenging Denial for Growth
• 9:09 Letting Go of Societal Timelines
• 11:53:00 Empowerment and Authenticity

Transcript

Manpreet Dhaliwal (00:00.376)
What if I told you that in order to improve your mental health, I could give you some knowledge that could help you get there, but you would need to allow just the right amount of discomfort mixed with the right amount of gentle self-compassion. And that is what we are going to be focused on today. Today I will guide you through the steps that you can take right now to improve your mental wellness. So let's start.

Let's start with slowing down and observing in stillness. This may be difficult to do to really slow down and to observe what you've been feeling and what you've been experiencing emotionally, physically. After all, we have jobs to do, obligations to fulfill. So really, this is a battle that we all face. However,

To really improve our mental health, we have to come face to face with the emotions that we are feeling and how we are really doing because we can get lost in the hustle of life and we can lose ourselves in the hustle of life. Once overtaken by the hustle, sooner or later, we start to treat ourselves, our minds, our bodies like machines.

Well, guess what? We are not machines. We are living, breathing, feeling spiritual beings. We cannot recognize that we are suffering if we are busy and lost in the hustle of life. Therefore, we need to take a moment to slow down and observe our internal state.

If you are hurting inside but you're treating yourself like a machine, then you can never move forward towards your healing. However, if you're taking time to observe how you've been feeling, whether you've been feeling lost, broken, sad, or frustrated, or angry, you will be one step closer to wellness. See, the only way to move towards mental wellness is to

Manpreet Dhaliwal (02:22.69)
get really close up to those strong emotions. But to do it in such a way as not to be overtaken by the strong emotions, but to simply observe those emotions and feelings.

See, it's tricky because you need to observe your feelings but you need not to become overtaken by them. You need to stand back and watch your emotions like you watch the waves in the ocean. At the end of the day, the only way towards mental wellness is to allow yourself to observe and to look at those harsh feelings. This requires courage and taking the time to get up and walk towards the mirror and observe how you are really feeling.

rather than pushing all those emotions and feelings down and mindlessly going about your work obligations. So, take a moment today to slow down. Take a moment to breathe. Take a moment to check in with yourself and ask yourself, how are you really doing? Slowing down, you see, isn't just about taking a break. It's about tuning in to how you really feel.

emotionally and physically. It's easy to get caught up in the hustle, but if we don't pause to check in with ourselves, we risk losing being in touch with our own well-being. In order to see how you are really doing, you also need to challenge denial. Challenging denial not only allows you to see a clear picture and gives you opportunity to see yourself in a healthier position, but it also allows you

to move towards change. Change cannot come when we are living with the same perceptions and same inaccurate cognitive beliefs. At one point in time, if we really want change, we have to be willing to have those thoughts or beliefs challenged. Sometimes we may need to challenge those thoughts constantly to see if we have an accurate understanding of the situation.

Manpreet Dhaliwal (04:36.898)
that we find ourselves in. However, we must be careful not to gaslight our own selves. But what is gaslighting? Yourself. Gaslighting refers to manipulating yourself into doubting your reality or your own feelings, often in attempt to avoid facing a difficult truth. For example, individuals may have this perception of their partner as loving,

but the real reality may be that their partner is actually emotionally abusive. The perception that they have is inaccurate. They might even have an internal voice trying to tell them that the partner is emotionally abusive. They might figure that an accurate cognitive perception of their partner is that their partner is healthy. In this moment, they are engaging in denial.

And chances are you might be engaging in denial yourself. You might be telling yourself that hey, you are happy or that your partner is a loving partner when the reality may be quite the opposite. Denial is the most common defense mechanism. It is when you avoid reality or facts to cope with a difficult situation or circumstance. This denial may help you avoid painful feelings. For example, saying you're happy

when you're upset may help you avoid the reality that you may have to let go of that relationship and take some time to be alone. Or you may find yourself saying that the job that you're at is a prestigious position where you're being paid well. These ideas may hide the fact that you are being bullied at the job site. Staying in denial

may be easier than facing the denial and moving towards some discomfort by changing one's For example, challenging denial may be facing the fact that you are being overworked and not being valued for the work that you're putting in. We often stay in denial because it's easier than facing the discomfort of change.

Manpreet Dhaliwal (06:57.454)
But real transformation happens when we confront the uncomfortable truths. So ask yourself gently and with compassion, where are you engaging in denial in your life? Where are you engaging in denial?

Manpreet Dhaliwal (07:16.426)
Letting go of denial may lead you to face the fact that you also need to let go of some shoulds in your life. Denial can feel safer in the moment, but it only keeps us stuck. It's important to challenge the stories we tell ourselves even when it's uncomfortable. Are you in a relationship, a job, or a situation where you're ignoring your true feelings? Take a moment to reflect on your true feelings.

Is it hard to cognitively decide how you truly feel? Then in that case, pay attention to your body. What do you feel in your stomach when you think of the situation you're in? Whether it's your job, whether it's a relationship, or whether it's any other situation that you find yourself in. And of course, like I said before, letting go of denial may lead you to face the facts that

you also need to let go of some shoots in your life. So timelines are societal numbers placed on a line based on what has historically and traditionally been considered appropriate. Timelines are also when we hear from individuals about the appropriate age for finishing school, getting married, and having children.

However, to be truly happy, we need to let go of these man-made timelines and create and cultivate a life that feels healthy, true, and authentic to us. I say healthy because some relationships are not healthy and individuals find themselves in unhealthy relationships to satisfy a timeline. Or workplaces may have an unhealthy workplace environment or may be unsafe or emotionally unsafe

or may not be valuing their employees or providing, you know, the rightful salary to their employee, but the person may stay at the workplace because on paper it looks like quite an accomplishment and on paper it may look prestigious. To arrive at mental wellness, we need to be in a healthy environment. And in order to be in a healthy environment with healthy individuals around us, we need

Manpreet Dhaliwal (09:38.83)
to let go of the shoulds. You see these timelines keep us stuck. They keep us stuck in an unhealthy state, as does denial, as does a lack of stillness. All these obstacles come in the way of optimum mental well-being. So it's important for us to be still, to observe, to be compassionate, but to still observe our emotions, to not be overtaken by our emotions.

and then to challenge the denial with compassion once again. And lastly, to let go of societal timelines. Every step to a state of healthy well-being requires compassion and a gentleness that every human being deserves in this rough world. So take some time today. Take a moment to write down one should in your life that no longer serves you.

Take some time to think about one thing that you've been telling yourself that you should be doing. Go ahead, maybe pause this podcast episode and write down one thing that you've been telling yourself that you should be doing. Maybe it's an age-based milestone or something that society expects from you. Take a moment to write it down. What would happen if you let go

that expectation. What could you replace that expectation with that would honor your true authentic path? Can you muster up the courage to stay still and observe?

Can you give yourself tender warmth and compassion and ask yourself what reality are you denying? Ask yourself, what should can you let go to create space for your own authentic happiness? You got this. You deserve your happiness. You deserve optimum mental wellness. You deserve to focus on your mental wellness so you can live a happy,

Manpreet Dhaliwal (11:53.44)
and peaceful and authentic life. You have the strengths within you. You just needed these tools. Now go ahead and carry out your own road, carve out your own path to mental well-being. Remember, this journey is yours to navigate and you are worthy of the happiness that lies ahead. You've already taken the first step towards healing by seeking out these tools.

and listening to this podcast episode. Trust that you have the strength within you to continue onto this path of wellness. Thank you for listening to today's episode and I hope to see you again in the next episode. Take a moment to like this podcast, maybe review it, send me any anonymous questions, topics you may have and see you later. Take care.